Mama Wheeljack
by AutobotV
Summary: Sequel to the popular Everyone Loves Wheeljack! Who is the father of Wheeljack's baby and your votes counted big time! How will our Wheeljack cope with being a mummy and will he ever find love?
1. Chapter 1

**Mama Wheeljack**

It had been a while since Spike had visited the Autobots and for some reason he decided to pop in and say hi. Being the annoying, always getting in the way, causing trouble, stupid, cry-baby teen that he was he felt like it was his duty to be friends with the Autobots and help them understand the planet Earth. Also he wanted to find out why the news channel's and the newspapers were suddenly calling the Autobots and Decepticons gay. As he approached the base he noticed Sunstreaker holding 20 odd cans of pink paint and his brother Sideswipe holding 20 odd cans of blue, arguing with each other.

'I'm telling you Sunny, it's gonna be a boy!' snarled Sideswipe.

'It's gonna be a girl! And she'll be called Sunstreckess!'

'Who in their right mind would call a baby Sunstreakess!?'

Sideswipe stared at his brother for a moment.

'Never mind.' muttered the red twin.

Spike was a little surprised the Autobots were suddenly talking about babies. Why should they care about babies. Anyway the brothers noticed Spike and waved hello.

'Hey Spike! You want to help us paint the nursery?'

'Nursery? Who's pregnant?' chuckled Spike, meaning it as a joke.

'Wheeljack, he got **BEEP**ed by Optimus, Megatron and Unicron. We're still trying to figure out who the father is!'

Spike's jaw dropped. Then his hair turned white, then his teeth fell out. Then he ran away screaming. The brothers looked at each other.

'Humans.' they muttered.

Meanwhile Wheeljack was...where is he...hang on a sec...oh found him. Wheeljack was getting pushed around in a wheelchair by Optimus Prime in Walmart near the baby section. Optimus decided that he and Wheeljack should bond so it would make a good impression on the baby, however Wheeljack was not enjoying himself.

Wheeljack: Why are YOU doing this to me!

AutobotV: Optimus suggested it. Besides he's a possible father and you need the rest.

Wheeljack sighed as Optimus began picking out teddies.

'How about this one?' asked Prime.

'No.' mumbled Wheeljack.

'Now look here Wheeljack, you're gonna be the mama of that kid and I want someone who is loving and caring! Now help me choose a toy for Optimus Prime Jr!'

'Optimus Prime Jr?'

'That's what his name is gonna be!'

'But what if it's a girl?'

'I decided that the rest of the Autobots can name her if its a girl.'

Wheeljack sighed.

'Optimus...aren't you at least a little freaked out that I am possibly giving birth to your kid? I mean I'm a guy!'

'We're robots you idiot! We don't have genders!'

'Then how do you explain Elita-1?'

'Possibly a gay Autobot...like Starscream.'

'But you dated her! Plus how can we be gay if we have no gender?'

'Hey look! A sale on king sized diapers!' cried Optimus running off.

Wheeljack moaned and dropped his face into his hands. First all of the Autobots wanted to** BEEP** him, then he got **BEEP**ed by Prime, Megatron and, somehow, Unicron and now he was pregnant. Also to make matters worse no one knew who the father was since I did all three scenes! How could his life get any worse? Then would you believe Megatron showed up. Wheeljack almost jumped out of his chair.

'M-Megatron? What are you doing here?' asked the pregnant mech.

'What do you think! I'm here to see how Megara is doing!'

'Who the slag is Megara?'

'It's what I'm calling my daughter you fool! Now eat this!'

Megatron them produced an organic fruit bar. Wheeljack looked at it dumbfounded.

'What do I do with that?'

'I just told you to eat it!' snarled Megatron.

'I'm a machine you idiot! I don't eat!' snapped Wheeljack.

'Now look here you fool! it's says that Pregnant mummies have to eat healfly food! I'm trying to be a good father here!'

At that moment Optimus Prime came back and was angered that Megatron was upsetting Wheeljack. He didn't want Wheeljack to get all stressed in fear it might affect the baby.

'Megatron go away!' snapped Optimus Prime

'How about you go away! That's my kid he's got!' snarled Megatron.

As the mechs argued poor Wheeljack sighed. That's when I decided to help! Soon the Autobots were approached by, may I say, a beautiful young lady. The Autobots stopped and stared at her and for some reason Wheeljack got the urge to hit her! Wonder why?

'Who the slag are you?' demanded Megatron.

'I'm the author you twit! AutobotV!'

'WHAT! YOU'RE THE BITCH WHO PUT ME THROUGH THAT HELL?' screamed Wheeljack.

'Chill Wheeljack, I'm here to help. No one knows who the father is, you got two of the three possible fathers arguing over you and you are completely freaked out! I believe I found the solution!'

'What's that?'

AutobotV gave Wheeljack a business card. Wow, feels weird when I'm writing and acting at the same time! Wheeljack looked at it as AutobotV walked away.

'See you at the studio at Five, don't be late!'

'Studio?' said all three mechs.

* * *

And welcome to the AutobotV Talkshow! We deal with real problems everyday, from family problems to straining relationships! Today we have an Autobot who found out he was pregnant not too long ago but has no idea who the father is! Also he is freaked out that even though he is a guy he is somehow pregnant. So ladies and gents, please welcome Wheeljack! 

Wheeljack suddenly found himself in a studio, with cameras, lights and a few empty couches on a stage. Plus there was an audience making the poor mech feel a little afraid. However he got angry again when he saw AutobotV standing on the stage with a Mic. He marched up to her and screamed,

'What the slag is all this?'

'This is my talkshow Wheeljack! Kinda like the Jerry Spinger show but without the nerd in glasses!'

'How can I be on a talkshow?'

'Look at the screen!'

Wheeljack looked under the screen to see the words, 'Distressed Parent Struggles To Find Baby's Father' along with an AutobotV Show logo right next to it. He looked back at her and glared.

'How will this help!?'

'Trust me Wheeljack, now take a seat!' Wheeljack muttered to himself as he took a seat. AutobotV sat next to him and grinned.

'So Wheeljack, how does it feel to be a mother-to-be?'

'Awful! I'm a guy for **BEEP**'s sake!'

'Not important. Anyway it appears you got **BEEP**ed by three guys and only one of those guys is the father!' Then someone from the audience screamed,

'Whore!'

AutobotV stood up and snarled at the audience.

'When I want your opinion I'll ask for it! No one make another noise or my security guard will kick you out!'

Then Grimlock walked on the stage wearing a black shirt with the AutobotV Show logo on it. Wheeljack was shocked to see his own creation was working for the very person who ruined his life. Hey wait a minute I didn't ruin it!

'Like slag you did!' muttered Wheeljack.

Wheeljack looked up at Grimlock and shook his head. Grimlock just cutely waved his hand at Wheeljack.

'Grimlock why are you here?' demanded Wheeljack.

'AutobotV promised Grimlock that she would give Grimlock lots of cookies!' said the Dinobot.

'Grimlock, you're a robot so therefore you don't eat. I mean for **BEEP**'s sake you don't even have a mouth!'

For a very long time Grimlock stood there thinking. Thinking very hard. Thinking very, very hard. Thinking so hard, I'm surprised he doesn't blow a circuit already. Finally after what seemed like an hour he faced AutobotV and snarled.

'You tricked Grimlock!' he cried.

'No shit Sherlock.' came the voice again from the audience. AutobotV Glared at the audience trying to figure out who was talking out of line, I mean this is really starting to even piss me off and I'm the one whose writing! AutobotV then returned her attention to the upset Grimlock.

'OK Grimlock I did trick you, however if you promise to stay and beat up anybody I want you to beat up I'll give you Chocolate ice-cream!'

Grimlock stared at her for a while.

'With sprinkles?'

'Yep!'

'YAY!

Wheeljack slapped his face in disappointment as Grimlock ran off singing the Ice Cream song. AutobotV chuckled as she sat down next to Wheeljack.

'Anyway we have one of the three possible fathers outside waiting to come in. Ladies, gents and the Autobots I give you Optimus Prime!' As the audience cheered and music began playing Optimus appeared on the stage and took a seat next to Wheeljack. the text on the screen then changed to 'A Heroic Father To Be?' AutobotV then stood up so she could address the two mechs.

'So Optimus Prime how does it feel that you are possibly going to be the father?'

'Great! I got awesome plans of Optimus Prime Jr!'

'What makes you think it's a boy? Have you decided on a girls name?'

'Well I wanted to let the rest of the Autobots decide on that. So far I got Bumbleina, Jazzy, Rachelette, Brawina, Sunstreakess and Toaster-Oven!'

'Wait a minute! You didn't even ask me!' cried Wheeljack.

'You never asked! Alright then what would you call her then?' demanded Optimus.

'Well...I'd call her...Swirl or something.' muttered Wheeljack.

'HAH! That's why I never asked you! You gave all the Dinobots names starting with the letter S! Plus what kind of name is Something? That's bad parenting!'

'I didn't mean it like that you idiot! Also what about Grimlock? His starts with a G.'

'He's a special case. He has to stand out, I mean I'm surprised he can even think.'

AutobotV calmed the two as she took the stage.

'OK here's the problem. You two aren't getting along ever since the FIL incident. Optimus Prime, you're still mad at Wheeljack for building the FIL and causing you to BEEP him. He did make you do something stupid which ended your 9 million year relationship with Elita-1 but you have to respect Wheeljack and care for him, he is going to be the mummy of your son or daughter!'

Optimus Prime looked down and then AutobotV turned her attention to Wheeljack.

'Wheeljack just remember who built the FIL in the first place! You got yourself into this mess so grin in and bear it. Plus being a mother might be a new experience for you! Also think of another girly name for your kid, one that doesn't begin with S.'

Wheeljack sighed and Optimus spoke.

'OK, I'll respect Wheeljack a little more. I only ask that he stops inventing things while he's with child! Plus when he has the baby he has see to him or her at night as punishment!' AutobotV smiled.

'Sure, you can do that right Wheeljack?'

'I suppose.'

'And now ladies and gentlemen I give you the evil, the monstrous, the terrible, the sicko, the diabolical, the deceiving, the...'

'JUST GET ON WITH IT!' screamed the voice from the audience which won another glare from AutobotV.

'Jeez people relax. Anyway, here's Megatron!'

Music played and the crowd booed as Megatron walked on. He snarled at them and took a seat next to Wheeljack so Wheeljack sat in between the leaders of both fractions. On the screen the text then said 'The Evil yet Kinky Leader of the Decepticons! What Kind of Father Figure is That?' Megatron glared at Optimus who glared back. AutobotV felt the tension and decided to get this over with.

'So Megatron, do you think you're the father?'

'Of course I am! Her name's gonna be Megara and she's going to be my little princess of EVIL!' snarled the evil machine. There was a small silence in the studio.

'Ooooookay. So what are your plans with Wheeljack after he gives birth?'

'Simple, if the baby is mine, which it is, Wheeljack will return to Decepticon base and be a slave for the Decepticon cause! He has to change her diapers, feed her, cloth her and has to clean the whole base from top to bottom.'

'WHAT!' cried Wheeljack.

'That's a bit extreme Megatron.' said AutobotV.

'He has to know his place!'

'What's that supposed to mean!' snapped Wheeljack.

'Megatron, Wheeljack is a person not a thing. If the baby is yours than you have to work together to raise it. I mean even if you are the father I wouldn't let you take care of that poor child if you're gonna mistreat Wheeljack like that!' Megatron grunted and glared at Wheeljack.

'YOU WILL CLEAN THE DIAPERS!' he barked.

'Asshole.' muttered Wheeljack.

'Anyway this whole thing isn't just affecting you two it also effects Unicron, the third possible father! Let's give a hand to the planet eater everyone!'

'You're not seriously gonna let him in here!' cried Optimus, as Wheeljack suddenly hid behind him.

'Optimus I swear I'll have more of your kids if you keep that giant hornball away from me!' whimpered the shivering mech.

'Don't be stupid, he's communicating via Satellite...oh wait a minute...no he ate the satellite he's gonna have to come in.'

'WHAT!' cried all three mechs. Suddenly a giant foot landed right next to the three Transformers. Looking up till their necks strained they could just make out the gigantic brute. Wheeljack cowered behind Optimus. AutobotV pulled out a megaphone.

'HIYA UNICRON!' she screamed.

'Greetings pitiful creatures.' boomed the giant.

The a new text appeared on the screen that went 'How the hell did he **BEEP** Wheeljack?' AutobotV continued.

'SO UNICRON, HOW WILL YOU RAISE YOUR KID ALONGSIDE WHEELJACK?' she screamed.

'I'm planning on having at least 10 or 12 kids. Wheeljack will be their mother of course. Then I'll eat him.'

'OH DEAR PRIMUS PLEASE DON'T LET HIM BE THE FATHER!' screamed Wheeljack, still cutely hiding behind Optimus. AutobotV chuckled nervously.

'I DON'T THINK WHEELJACK CAN HANDLE THAT BIG GUY!' cried AutobotV.

'Then I'll just **BEEP** him some more until he does.'

At that point Wheeljack fell over into Prime's arms, completely out cold. Then a new text appeared on the screen 'Optimus and Wheeljack in a relationship?'

'We are not.' muttered Optimus.

'YOU BETTER NOT!' screamed the voice again. This time AutobotV had it and walked straight into the crowd. Looking around widely she cried,

'Who is that? Show yourself bitch!'

Suddenly a tall pink Autobot stood up glaring at Wheeljack, still out cold. AutobotV sighed and looked at Grimlock.

'Grimlock you big dummy I told you not to let Elita-1 in here!'

'Sorry, but Elita-1 promised Grimlock cookies!'

This time it was AutobotV who slapped her head...OW, that hurt. Elita-1 walked down and took a seat next to Prime glaring at him. Plus she seemed kinda pissed that her boyfriend had another man in his arms. Now the text read 'Physco Bitch Wants to Kill Wheeljack'. Elita-1 snarled at AutobotV.

'I'm not a Physco Bitch.'

'Like hell you aren't.' muttered Megatron.

Elita-1 glared at her foe.

'What does that mean you asshole?'

'Anyway, Elita-1 nice to see you. So everyone this is Optimus Prime's EXgirlfriend. So how does it feel that your man is having a child with another...guy.' asked AutobotV, trying to hide a growl.

'It's wrong I tell you! Prime is my boyfriend! I should be having his kids!'

'We tried Elita but it never worked!' argued Prime with Wheeljack still in his arms.

'Oh I don't care about kids! Do you have any idea how terrible my sex life has been since you've been gone! I had to resort to drastic measures!'

Suddenly the crowd got interested. Bunch of pervs.

'You mean...you have a girlfriend now?' asked AutobotV.

'No, I slept with a Decepticon.' answered the pink Physco.

There was a silence in the room and then everyone looked at Megatron. Megatron looked back at everyone else.

'What? You think it was me? NO WAY! Prime may be into physco bitches but I ain't!' he snarled.

'Yeah, Megatron's into high pitched voiced Decepticons like Starscream!' chuckled Prime.

'Yeah! I'm into...WHAT!'

'Then who?' asked Prime, returning his attention to his EXgirlfriend.

'Who do you think...Shockwave!'

'WHAT!' cried both Optimus and Megatron.

'He was the only guy available...except for Alpha Trion but I'm not sleeping with that dirty old machine! I needed a man Prime, I've been alone for four million years!' screamed the pink Physo. Everyone else in the room looked at Shockwave who looked down in shame.

'Well you'd have a tough time too if you were surrounded by hot chicks.' muttered the one optic Decepticon.

'So you ditch me for a faceless freak?' growled Optimus.

'You don't have one!' argued Elita-1

'At least I don't have a lightbulb for an optic! You whore, I knew you were up to something!'

'Well at least sleep with that unattractive piece of trash!' snarled Elita-1, pointing at Wheeljack who was now sleeping in Prime's arms. AutobotV snarled at the comment and gave the signal to Grimlock.

'OK GRIMLOCK! KICK HER OUT!'

'Me, Grimlock get to kick out the Physco bitch!' boomed the Dinobot, and quite literally he kicked her out.

'I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!' she howled.

'Hate you to...bitch!' snarled AutobotV.

Then AutobotV returned her attention to the three possible fathers of Wheeljack's baby.

'OK the real reason I brought you all down here is so we can figure out who the father is! So I got the results of the tests I took and...'

At that moment Wheeljack woke up.

'Wait a minute! Don't I get a say?' he cried.

'Er...sure why not.'

Wheeljack sat back on his chair and AutobotV sat next to him.

'So Wheeljack...is there anything that concerns you or worries you...something to get off your chest?'

'There is...ever since I joined the Autobots I worked and worked to make THEIR lives better! For 9 million years I worked and then one day I tried to make my life a little better and what happens!'

Wheeljack grabs a box of tissue and begins crying...awww.

'I...sniff...I get **BEEP**ed by these...sniff...jerks and then they get all...sniff...mad at me...sniff...and now I'm pregnant with their kid...sniff...and they still treat me like trash...sniff...all I want is a little respect!'

Wheeljack then starts crying into his hands and AutobotV hugs him, glaring at all three possible fathers.

'Now look what you did!' she snapped.

'W-what? He's the one who always invents crazy things!' argued Megatron.

'I do admit I treated him rough but I never knew it was this bad.' muttered Prime.

'Can we go **BEEP** now?' boomed Unicron.

Everyone glared at him.

'Unicron, don't you have feelings?' asked AutobotV.

'No.' he replied.

The all of a sudden Chip Chase appeared, leaving me gob smacked cause I was pretty sure I killed him off...oh wait I sent him to the hospital. Anyway he took the stage while AutobotV was still hugging the sobbing Wheeljack.

'Ladies and Gentlemen! It's not Optimus Prime's, Megatron's or Unicron's fault that Wheeljack is suffering! It's AutobotV's fault!' he cried.

'WHAT!' cried AutobotV standing up in rage. Wheeljack suddenly sat up and stopped crying realizing that Chip was making a very bad mistake.

'Chip, you better stop!' he warned.

Chip wasn't listening and continued.

'AutobotV ruined Wheeljack's life the moment she wrote this fic! She's a heartless, cold skinned bitch who takes pleasure from other peoples pain!'

'Seriously Chip, I think you better stop.' warned Optimus, who noticed the black flames of rage burning in AutobotV's eyes.

'I mean what kind of sick person would do this to a poor Autobot? She would and I bet their are more people out there like her! Sick, sick people who should be put away'

'I really don't like this kid but he should seriously watch out!' snickered Megatron.

'Which is why, I, Chip Chase will hack into AutobotV's laptop and delete all her work that she inflicts on these poor Autobots!'

That's when Chip noticed AutobotV standing behind him with a forced grin. Chip just stared at her when she ushered him onto the stage.

'Chip...why don't you...join us?' she said in a very, very, very low tone.

'Gladly!' he said and took his place on stage. Wheeljack looked at AutobotV confused.

'What are you doing?' he asked.

'Don't worry, I got something planned for him!' snickered AutobotV.

AutobotV then returned her attention to the stage.

'OK people! Now you know what Wheeljack wants so you better tell me what you're planning to do when and if he has your kid!' she ordered. Optimus Prime stood up.

'I will respect Wheeljack some more...and I'll let him name it if it's a girl. And we can work out the waking up in the middle of the night duty!'

'Good! What about you Megatron?' asked AutobotV.

'Well since he's an Autobot and I'm a Decepticon, I suppose we can take it in turns to raise her. I want to have the weekdays though.'

'Awesome! OK Unicron what about you?'

'I want 20 kids now!' boomed the giant.

'That...isn't really an improvement Unicron.' muttered AutobotV. She shrugged and turned her attention to the audience.

'OK everyone this is it! The part you were waiting for! The results are in and we have found the father!'

'Alright!' cried Optimus and Megatron. Wheeljack just began to worrying and clutch his chair arms.

'OK...and the father, the one who BEEPed Wheeljack and got him pregnant, the one who has to take full responsibility of raising the child...is...'

'OW!'

Everyone stopped to see Wheeljack grab his tummy in pain. He stood up and gasped.

'OW! OW! Why does this hurt? OW!' he howled.

'Are you OK?' asked Optimus Prime.

AutobotV then jumped with shock.

'Holy Crap! Are you going into labour?' she cried.

'WHAT! I was only pregnant for a day!' howled Wheeljack.

AutobotV checked her notes. She then looked at Wheeljack and chuckled nervously.

'Heh, heh...I forgot to tell you that Transformers pregnancy's only last 24 hours!' she said quietly.

'WHAT! YOU MEAN...IT'S COMING?' cried the panicked mech, who fell back into the chair in shock.

'OK Wheeljack don't panic, Ratchet's here remember!' chuckled AutobotV.

Ratchet then appeared and examined Wheeljack.

'He's going to have to give birth here! We can't move him!' informed the mech.

'HERE?' cried Wheeljack.

Soon Wheeljack found he was covered in blankets with Ratchet and AutobotV preparing to catch the baby with Optimus Prime and Megatron standing either side of him holding his hands. Wheeljack was screaming and crying.

'WHY!? WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME!?' he screamed.

'That's it Wheeljack! Let it all out!' said Optimus, holding his hand.

'Let's see...the book says to breath out constantly!' informed Megatron, reading a little baby book. Wheeljack glared at him.

'I DON'T HAVE LUNGS!'

'You know this is all AutobotV's fault!' shouted Chip.

'Shut up Chip.' muttered Wheeljack, noticing AutobotV snarl. Don't worry, Chip's gonna regret it all! For hours Wheeljack screamed, and cried, and pushed and did everything that I told him to do. Then Ratchet poked his head up.

'I see the head!' he cried.

'ABOUT TIME!' wailed Wheeljack, in pain, alot of pain.

'OK Wheeljack! Just one more push!' cried AutobotV.

Wheeljack howled in pain...and then the cute wailing of a baby was heard within the studio. Ratchet held up a cute little baby Autobot.

'Congrats! It's a boy!'

'That's fine and dandy...but who's the dad!' demanded Wheeljack. AutobotV jumped slightly and looked at her notes. She looked up and grinned.

'The father is none other than...OPTIMUS PRIME!' she cried.

'Optimus Prime Jr!' cried Optimus grabbing the baby and hugging it. Megatron's jaw dropped in horror and Unicron seemed upset. I pitied them so I gave a hand...but not that kind of hand.

'You know Megatron...I bet Starscream can give birth to babies!' offered AutobotV. Megatron suddenly grinned evilly.

'Thats true!' cried the Decpeticon leader, running into the audience and grabbing the slightly surprised Starscream.

'Come Starscream, you must help me create Megara!'

'Oh really...I mean, WHAT!'

As the Decepticons ran off AutobotV looked up at Unicron. As I said, Chip was gonna pay for that insult!

'Unicron! Human's with wheels can give birth to giant babies!'

'WHAT!' cried Chip.

Soon Chip found himself being lifted into the air by a giant hand. He screamed when Unicron picked him off and flew away leaving just Optimus Prime, Wheeljack and their baby. AutobotV walked up and smiled.

'Congrats Wheeljack! You're a mummy!' she chuckled.

'y-yeah...I'm a...mummy...' wheezed the tired mech. Optimus Prime was cooing his baby.

'Aw look he has my truck mode. And he has Wheeljack's light-up voice things! And he's got my red body with Italian coloured feet! Awww look at him!'

Well it's seems these two will get on just fine but let's find out what happens two weeks later! Optimus prime is still cooing over his son with the rest of the Autobots, Starscream is now pregnant with megatron's child and Chip is expecting twins! Wheeljack is taking a break in his workshop happy that it was finally over...wait...he isn't happy! Wheeljack what's wrong?

'Sorry, it's just that I really wanted someone to find me attractive!' he sighed.

Baby problems?

'Oh no, Optimus Prime Jr is great and I teach him everyday but Optimus wants to give him all the attention. But Optimus Prime doesn't find me attractive and I bet no one will.'

At that moment a transformer walked in and Wheeljack jumped in surprise.

'How did you get in here?' he demanded.

The transformer held out a card and rose which Wheeljack took and read.

'Dear Wheeljack, I really like you and I think you're hot. I don't wanna **BEEP** but I wanna go out with you! Please give me an answer or I'll be in pain! Yours forever...Soundwave?'

Soundwave looked down blushing the moment Wheeljack looked up. Wheeljack was surprised the Decepticon actually like him, he always thought he was the...quiet type. Wheeljack was silent for a moment but then he asked,

'Soundwave, do you really like me?'

'YEAH. I LIKE YOU ALOT. CAN WE GO OUT? I KNOW A GOOD PIT STOP.'

Wheeljack paused for a moment. Then gave his answer.

'Oh what the heck.' he said.

The transformers left the room together holding hands, leaving Optimus to spend the rest of the day with his son.

_Believe or not! There's a part 2!_


	2. Chapter 2

_Mama Wheeljack Part 2_

_by AutobotV_

Wheeljack was for once in his entire life in a very difficult decision. A decision that would reflect himself on others around him, one decision that would probably haunt him for the rest of his life. If he picked the wrong choice he would forever be tormented but if he picked the right choice he would never have to remember this horrible event again.Should he order a bag of fries or just a cheeseburger?

Wheeljack: What kind of choice is that?

AutobotV: You're in a burger bar so shut up!

As you remember Wheeljack was invited out by Soundwave, the cool and totally awesome Decepticon Communication Officer, who apparently has a crush on our hero...awww. Anyway Soundwave forgot that Transformers don't eat so therefore brought to a burger bar for no good reason. Apparently someone told him him it was a good place for couples and would would you believe it was Spike who told him...wait a minute...why did Spike tell Soundwave about this? Never mind I'll fry him later. Anyway both Wheeljack and Soundwave were sitting in a diner, that was coincidently big enough to fit a pair of 25ft robots, trying to have a good first date. It was still surprising Wheeljack that Soundwave was really nervous and he was blushing, somehow. Truthfully Wheeljack was also nervous. Not because Soundwave was a Decepticon but because it was indeed his first date and first impressions count. He was still trying to figure out what to order while Soundwave sat opposite him, still blushing. Y'know, I might just lend a hand!

AutobotV: Wheeljack say something!

Wheeljack: Like what?

AutobotV: How his day was, what's your favorite thing...anything!

Wheeljack looked back at Soundwave, who was still blushing really cute-like and the Autobot scientist decided to break the silence..about time.

'So Soundwave...what are you into?' asked Wheeljack, still a little nervous.

'I LIKE ANIMALS.' replied the Decepticon.

'Really? I always thought you Decepticons were into chaos and all that.'

'NO, THAT'S MEGATRON. I LIKE ANIMALS, MUSIC AND...YOU.'

AutobotV: AWWWWWWW!!!

Wheeljack: Do you mind?

AutobotV: Sorry.

Wheeljack was surprised with what Soundwave had told him. The animal and music bit made sense, I mean look at Ravage and Laserbeak aren't they cute or what, plus he was a cassette player but why did he like him? Why did Soundwave like him all of a sudden? He had to ask.

'So what do you like about me?'

'IT STARTED WHEN I SAW YOU ON THE AUTOBOTV SHOW.'

'You watched that?' asked the suddenly shocked Wheeljack, he figured that no one would watch a lame TV show with a stupid hostess...HEY!

Then Soundwave told Wheeljack how he watched the whole thing, meaning we're going into a flashback mode! A few weeks ago when Wheeljack, Optimus Prime, Megatron and Unicron were guests on the AutobotV show, some of the Decepticons stayed at base to watch the show including Soundwave and his crew. He was also watching it with Thrust, those three Reflector guys and the other two Seekers, Skywarp and Thundercracker. As they watched the show they got to the bit where Grimlock just kicked Elita-1 out the building.

'Ha! Serves her right!' snickered Thundercracker.

'I felt really sorry for Optimus Prime when he started dating that weirdo. He deserves someone so much better.' sighed Reflector.

The Decepticons stared at him, a little disgusted.

'Shut up Reflector.' snapped Skywarp, hitting all three of them on the heads.

They then returned their attention to the TV. At that moment was Wheeljack was crying at how the Autobots and the Decepticons (and Unicron) never gave him any respect even though he was having their child. Soundwave noticed the tears and how poor Wheeljack expressed how he suffered through the terrible ordeal...alright I admit it was partly my fault but he built that stupid FIL thing! And Arcee said he wasn't hot enough or something! Anyway Soundwave watched as Wheeljack exposed his soul on the stage. The other Decepticons just laughed at his pain but hey it's their job.

'Hah, what a wimp!' laughed Skywarp.

'His fault in the first place, stupid Autobot.' chuckled Thrust.

'I can't believe Optimus Prime **BEEP**ed that ugly thing, he deserves so much better.' sighed Reflector.

The Decepticons stared at him again.

'Dude, seriously if you keep talking like that, the writer will do to you what she did to that human on wheels!' warned Thundercracker.

'What was that?' asked the camera Decepticon.

Skywarp produced a picture of Chip Chase in pregnancy with Unicron's twins. I know that Transformers don't have organic organs and such but the sight of the picture made all three mechs throw-up, it was that bad!

'OH PRIMUS GET RID OF IT!' howled Reflector, shielding his optics.

Skywarp put it away and all the Decepticons returned to viewing the crying Wheeljack, still laughing. However Soundwave wasn't and the Decepticons noticed.

'Don't you find it funny Soundwave?' asked Frenzy, the tape cassette of doom...heh heh, sorry had to say that.

'NO. I THINK HE'S...BEAUTIFUL.' said the totally awesome Decepticon.

Now everyone stared at him, surprised that Soundwave would say something about an Autobot. End of flashback, Wheeljack was very surprised and a little giddy when he heard the whole story. Soundwave was still blushing.

'So...you like me when you saw me cry?' queried Wheeljack.

'I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. THE DECEPTICONS NEVER GIVE ME ANY RESPECT AND I ALWAYS GET THE INFORMATION, I ALWAYS GET THE DATA, I MAKE THE ENERGON CUBES AND I ALWAYS DO ALL THE HARD WORK AND DO THEY THANK ME? NO! MEGATRON PRAISES LASERBECK AND WITHOUT ME, HE'LL JUST FLY AROUND LIKE AN IDIOT! I DO ALL THE DANGEROUS WORK AND THEY NEVER THANKED ME! I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO SUFFERED AND THEN I SAW YOU AND I SAW YOUR PAIN!'

At that point Soundwave grabbed Wheeljack's hands...awwww.

'WHEN I SAW YOU CRY I FELT YOUR PAIN AND IT FELT AS IF OUR SOULS BECAME ONE. THAT WAS WHEN I REALIZED THAT I REALLY LIKED YOU...I JUST NEVER SAW IT.'

AutobotV: He's a poet and he didn't know it...sniff...it was beautiful.

Wheeljack: Oh jeez, what do I do? What do I say?

AutobotV: Oh...just say that was the most beautiful thing you ever heard and that you like him to!

Wheeljack gazed into Soundwave's optics and...oh no he's panicking!

'Soundwave...I...I...r-r-really...thought...that...w-w-what...you...said...was...was...was...I CAN'T DO IT!'

Then Wheeljack ran out the diner, his face red and his spark beating, leaving a poor and spark-brokened Soundwave all alone in a cheesy diner. I can't even believe he did that and I'm the writer here!

AutobotV: Wheeljack what are you doing? Soundwave was bearing his soul back there!

Wheeljack: Sorry...but...I was so nervous! I didn't know what to say and when I tried to say it I froze!

As the day ended Wheeljack returned to Autobot base, guilty and sad. He had met someone who liked him but he choked and left his crush behind in a cheesy burger bar. He slumped in his workshop and sighed, no wonder he could never get a girl, let alone a man...a hot robotic man like Soundwave...sorry, daydreaming here. As he drowned himself in his sorrows, Optimus Prime walked in carrying Optimus Prime Jr or OP Jr as everyone called him. Wheeljack didn't notice them come in but Optimus Prime could tell something was up.

'Wheeljack? You wanna help teach OP Jr how to transform?' asked Optimus Prime, cradling the sparkling in his arms.

Wheeljack shook his head.

'You wanna hold him?'

Wheeljack shook his head again. Optimus sat down and placed OP Jr on the table where he cutely crawled about.

'Is something wrong?' asked Optimus Prime, knowing that something was wrong with the mother of his sparkling. It was his job as the leader of the Autobots and as Wheeljack's...parenting partner to keep them happy. He did like Wheeljack but not in that way.

AutobotV: Wow Optimus, you're really keeping your word!

Optimus Prime: Well he's my sparkling's mother and I don't want OP Jr to grow up in a unloved environment!

Wheeljack sighed and his sparkling starting playing with his light-up head fins...he is so cute, I gotta draw a doodle of him sometime! Anyway back to Wheeljack.

'Optimus...I met someone who liked me...and he told me he really like me...and I ran away...and now I don't know what to do...I think I like him...but I'm too nervous and scared to tell him how I feel.'

Optimus slapped his back gently.

'Well if I were you I'd apologize and set up a date with...did you say him? Who is he?'

Wheeljack suddenly jumped, OP Jr now sitting in front of him with outstretched arms wanting to be picked up. If he told Optimus Prime that he had a crush on a Decepticon how would he react? Knowing Optimus he'd forbid him to even think about Soundwave, thinking it would be a bad influence on their son. He quickly picked up OP Jr and cradled him give Optimus a reassuring look.

'Oh don't worry about it Optimus. Why don't we go and teach OP Jr how to transform?'

As Wheeljack and Optimus Prime left the room with their sparkling, they were unaware that they were being watched. Laserbeak had recored the whole thing and flew back to Decepticon base. Instead of going straight to Megatron he went straight to Soundwave who watched the whole thing by himself. He sat slumped on his desk as he watched his love play with his sparkling with the leader of the Autobots. He sighed as he felt his spark being ripped in two...sorry I can't stand to see him like this, I mean I love the guy for Christ's sake.

AutobotV: Soundwave don't worry, he does like you!

Soundwave: BUT HE HAD OPTIMUS PRIME'S CHILD. HOW CAN I COMPETE WITH THAT?

AutobotV: Well if you go on dates, heat it up a little, cuddle together...he could have your kid!

Soundwave: WHAT IF HE DOESN'T WANT ANOTHER?

AutobotV: Trust me on this Soundwave. Now call him up and ask him out!

Soundwave looked at his phone and began playing with his fingers. His nerves began to kick in as he dialed Wheeljack's number, yes it was me I gave him the number! He sat down and listened to the ringing on the other end. However Wheeljack didn't answer, instead he got the answering machine.

'Hey this is Wheeljack, I'm not here right now so leave a message after the beep...and if this Elita-1 get BEEP.'

Soundwave:...

AutobotV: Aren't you going to say anything?

Soundwave: I'M WAITING FOR THE BEEP.

AutobotV: You just heard it!

Soundwave: I THOUGHT HE SAID THE F-WORD!

AutobotV: No, he just ran out of time! SAY SOMETHING!

Soundwave began to stuttered and mutter as he spoke. He wanted to ask if Wheeljack was in the mood for an all day date but he couldn't speak. He could but he wasn't doing it very well as his nerves had taken control.

'W-W-WHEELJACK...D-D-DO YOU...W-W-WANNA...'

At that moment someone picked up the phone.

'Hello?' asked someone at the other end.

Soundwave jumped and slammed the phone down. Even hearing Wheeljack's voice made him blush real bad and act like a nervous little school girl...aww. He tried dialing again but ended up calling someone else...I wonder who?

'ERR...WHEELJACK?' asked Soundwave when he heard someone pick up the other end.

'No this Megatron...why are you calling me Soundwave?'

'SORRY WRONG NUMBER.'

Then at that moment someone else picked up the phone.

'Megatron, this is Starscream. Guess what, she kicked!'

'Really! How hard?' asked the excited Decepticon leader.

'She almost ripped me in two! Who're you talking to anyway?'

'Soundwave, he got a wrong number.'

'Perfect! Soundwave you need to take me shopping to a high class baby shop! Megara needs her baby food when she is born and I don't want her to starve!' ordered the shrill-voiced Decepticon. Soundwave sighed.

'WE'RE TRANSFORMERS! YOU KNOW, GIANT TRANSFORMING ROBOTS! WE DON'T EAT!

'Oh shut up and take me shopping you walking pile of slag! Megatron you come too, you can pick out the clothes! Have to go, I just started knitting her a new sweater, ta-ta!'

Starscream hanged up leaving Megatron and Soundwave alone on the line.

'HE HAS BECOME QUITE A MOANING BITCH SINCE HE BECAME PREGNANT, HASN'T HE?' muttered Soundwave.

'Indeed he has...but he has my child and he will clean the diapers!' snapped Megatron before hanging up leaving Soundwave alone again.

* * *

After trying to teach their son how to transform Wheeljack and Optimus Prime went shopping for the little guy. Optimus had OP Jr strapped to his chest in a cute little pouch and Wheeljack just followed behind. As they wandered through the baby section of Walmart, Wheeljack began browsing at the baby food. Optimus had gone to get a photo of their Sparkling and left Wheeljack alone to clear his head. As Wheeljack looked at the crap my mother used to feed me he wondered, 

'Why am I even looking at this crap?' pondered the mech as he walked up and down before slamming into someone.

'So sorry!' he cried jumping back.

He looked up to see who he crashed into and almost fell over in shock. In front of him was Soundwave holding an armful of baby food and baby clothes. He was just as surprised at seeing Wheeljack at Walmart all alone. For a moment there was silence, then Soundwave broke it.

'W-WHAT A SURPRISE TO SEE YOU HERE, WHEELJACK. I WAS JUST SHOPPING FOR MEGARA, Y'KNOW, MEGATRON AND STARSCREAM'S SOON TO BE BORN SPARKLING. SO...WHERE'S OPTIMUS AND THE KID?'

'Oh...they're around...somewhere. I just walked down here for no reason...heh heh. Sooo...what's with the baby food?'

Soundwave glanced at the mountain of baby food in his arms.

'THIS IS ALL STARSCREAM'S IDEA. I TOLD HIM THAT WE DON'T EAT BUT HE DOESN'T LISTEN.

'Heh heh...sounds like him.'

The two mechs laughed nervously until they were once again surrounded by silence. A few moments passed until finally Soundwave spoke, blushing madly.

'WHEELJACK...D-D-DO YOU WANNA...GO...OUT...WITH ME?'

Wheeljack began blushing at this point and didn't know what to say...but don't worry I put an anti-running-away-force-field around him! As Wheeljack tried to get the right words out he suddenly got a very bad feeling. Turning round he almost cried out when he saw Optimus Prime walking up to them with a photo, he seemed happy.

'Hey Wheeljack, I got the perfect photo to put on your desk of OP Jr!' said the excited Autobot leader.

At that moment Optimus Prime noticed Soundwave standing behind Wheeljack and it got quiet. Not wanting a battle to break out in the middle of a super-market, Wheeljack tried to change the subject.

'It's a great photo Optimus! But...er...where's OP Jr?'

At that moment a cute mini red and blue with Italian colours semi-truck whizzed by honking it's horn cutely. It began running circles round Optimus and then Soundwave. Finally it circled round Wheeljack. Optimus Prime seemed proud at the moment.

'OP Jr finally mastered transforming!' beamed Optimus Prime.

Wheeljack grabbed the sparkling mini-truck, which transformed back into a cute sparkling. As Wheeljack cradled the sparkling, Soundwave leaned over and stuck out one of his fingers to let the little guy play with them.

'HE HAS YOUR OPTICS...AND YOUR LIGHT-UP-HEAD-FINS...AND YOUR ITAILIAN COLOURED LEGS.'

Wheeljack blushed a little but got nervous when Optimus came closer and gazed at his sparkling with the other two mechs. Wheeljack thought he was going to hit the Decepticon but instead he cooed his sparkling.

'Yes, I agree with you Soundwave. I always thought he got Wheeljack's optics...but he has my red chest and my blue head, doesn't he!'

'YES, I CAN SEE THE RESEMBLANCE.'

Wheeljack was surprised that Optimus Prime was just letting Soundwave coo the sparkling with him. Maybe Optimus didn't want to use violence in front of his sparkling or maybe he didn't mind Soundwave. Before Wheeljack could relax he suddenly got a chill running up his back. Looking round he almost dropped OP Jr when he saw Megatron pushing a pregnant Starscream in a wheelchair. Starscream appeared to be knitting a pink sweater with the purple Decepticon logo and Optimus Prime began to wonder if Wheeljack was ever going to make one. Megatron saw the group and snarled. He marched up to them and Wheeljack tried to hide behind Soundwave after giving OP Jr back to Prime, the Decepticon leader still scared him after the whole bondage thing. Megatron glared at Wheeljack.

'What are you doing here?' he growled.

'We're shopping for our sparkling! What are you doing here?' snapped Optimus.

'Starscream and I are shopping for my daughter. It's taking quite a while for her to be born...I thought the writer said that a transformer pregnancy only lasted 24 hours!'

AutobotV: My fic, my rules.

Thankfully Megatron wasn't looking for a fight, he was just pissed cause Starscream hadn't given birth just yet. He grabbed Soundwave and pushed Starscream along in his chair. Soundwave looked back at Wheeljack and brought his hand up to his face to shape a phone, trying to tell Wheeljack to call him later. Wheeljack waved goodbye and sighed as the Decepticons disappeared round the corner. Optimus Prime noticed.

'Is Soundwave the guy you got a crush on?' he asked.

Wheeljack jumped and looked back at Prime, worried he might flip that one of his own men had a crush on a Decepticon. However Prime shrugged and began walking to the exit.

'Just don't let him preach all that universal domination to you...last thing we need is OP Jr picking up Decepticon traits. Also he can't come into the base, you know what the guys are like when they see a Decepticon wandering around.'

'Optimus...aren't you mad?' asked the surprised mech.

'Not really. I mean Soundwave may be a Decepticon but he has good qualities...unlike some Decepticons I know. Anyway I promised someone that I wouldn't flip out on the whole thing.'

Wheeljack then suddenly glared at me...hey wait a second, why are you looking at me?

Wheeljack: You made Prime promise not to flip out didn't you?

AutobotV: He was shocked at first. Then a little angry, but I did tell him about Soundwave's good qualities. You're not mad are you?

Wheeljack: Well...no. It's just that how will Megatron react if he finds out Soundwave likes me?

AutobotV: Leave that to me!

Wheeljack: Why do I have a feeling this is going to go all wrong.

As Wheeljack left with Optimus Prime and their sparkling, the Decepticons were still waiting at the checkout. Starscream was still knitting, Megatron was still pissed and Soundwave was thinking about Wheeljack. Somehow he had to find a way to get the day off so he could have a date with Wheeljack but knowing Megatron, he'd kill him and then Wheeljack. Don't worry Soundwave I'm here to help!

AutobotV: Hey Megatron! Why don't you let Soundwave have a day off?

Megatron: ABSOLUTELY NOT! I need him in case Megara is born, he has all the baby music stored in him!

AutobotV: OK Megatron, I'll make you a deal. If you let Soundwave have a day off, Starscream will give birth tomorrow!

Megatron: Really? Well...OK fine! But you better keep your word!

Megatron glared at Soundwave, who seemed surprised.

'Soundwave you can have a day off work. Just don't come back to base with any virus's! I don't want Megara getting sick all of a sudden!' snarled the Decepticon leader.

Soundwave seemed happy he got a day off but was even more happy when he got a call on his cell phone from none other than Wheeljack! Yes, I gave Soundwave the cell phone and I gave Wheeljack his number! If it weren't for me these two would be going no where! Wheeljack seemed nervous on the other line but Soundwave made out what he said.

'So Soundwave...do you want to meet tomorrow? I have a day off.'

'Y-YEAH SURE! SEE YOU AT NINE?'

'Near that cheesy diner? Sure, see you at nine.'

Aww this is going so well! Tomorrow these two love-mechs will be going on their first date...or is this their second? Anyway, guess what I'm letting you guys decide what should happen next! Should they do the whole grab a meal, watch a movie, go on a romantic stroll and then go to the amusement park or should they go on some wacky adventure where everything goes wrong? I have a funny feeling what you're all going to pick but I want different ideas!

Wheeljack: You don't have any imagination do you? You always ask the readers for help!

AutobotV: I am not! I just want them to decide. Also, don't worry...they will BEEP, they will certainly BEEP!

Wheeljack: Again? W-w-well if it's with Soundwave then that should be alright...I guess.

AutobotV: You're not thinking any dirty thoughts are you Wheeljack?

Wheeljack: NO I'M NOT! I m-mean Soundwave is hot...and I always wondered what he'd be like in...OH LEAVE ME ALONE!

AutobotV: See you all next time! And I will be adding all your ideas of their date to the fic and (if I'm allowed) say who suggested it! Ta-ta for now!


	3. Chapter 3

Mama Wheeljack Part 3

By AutobotV

_Sorry it took so long...very long...I will try to update!_

It's the day you've all been waiting for! Wheeljack and Soundwave are off on their first...no wait...second date! I have been looking at all your ideas and I found some of them interesting...and I got some nasty ideas in my mind when I read them! So thanks for sending your ideas and enjoy! Right now Soundwave was waiting at the meeting point for Wheeljack, all polished and shiny. He left Frenzy, Rumble and Laserbeak at home because that lot always caused a hassle when he wanted alone time, complaining about leg room or something. He only brought Ravage but he was neatly tucked away inside of him, you never know when Bumblebee might be about. He wanted to impress Wheeljack since this was their official date and he even bought Wheeljack a...a...a...Soundwave what is that?

Soundwave: IT'S A ENERGON CUBE STUPID!

AutobotV: Ohhh...aww you even shaped it like a heart!

Soundwave: I DID?

Anyway Soundwave waited patiently for his date to arrive and his spark jumped a couple of beats when he saw Wheeljack running up to meet him. Wheeljack halted in front of Soundwave and straighted himself up, trying to make himself look at least presentable. By the way, he's wearing his face-guard again. Wheeljack seemed to give an expression that he was happy when Soundwave gave him the heart shaped Energon cube.

'Thanks Soundwave...why is it shaped funny?'

'I HAVE NO IDEA.'

'Right...anyway...where do you want to go first?'

'YOU WANNA GRAB BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S?'

Wheeljack stared at him confused and Soundwave smacked his own head. He had told himself not to take advice from a human but did he listen to me? Nooo...he had to go and talk to Spike, that little brat! As Soundwave tried to recover from the mistake he had made Wheeljack shrugged and took Soundwave's hand.

'How about we start off with a walk? I know a cool little park!' offered the Autobot.

'SURE. WHERE IS IT?'

Wheeljack now felt stupid. It was a few miles off from where they were and Wheeljack forgot that Soundwave transforms into a cassette player not a car. Wheeljack could get there easy but unless Soundwave grew a set of wheels he wasn't going any where. Jeez this date is starting off well! Wheeljack tried to solve the problem and came up with a solution.

'How about you slip inside me and I can give you a ride?' he suggested.

At that moment Soundwave went red, really red. Jeez he's going redder than Cliffjumpers paint job! Then Energon started spewing from his nose and he began to freak out.

'W-W-W-WHEELJACK...W-W-WE HAVEN'T...E-E-EVEN G-G-GOT TO...THAT S-S-STAGE...YET!' he stammered.

At first Wheeljack was confused. What stage was he talking about? What did he say wrong? Why was Soundwave freaking out?Wheeljack replayed with what he said a second ago in his head to try and spot the problem.

_'How about you slip inside me and I can give you a ride?'_

After a few moments trying to figure it out he started going red himself. He had no idea he had said something so normal and yet it sounded so...dirty Soon both Wheeljack and Soundwave were freaking out and I just started whisling and wooing!

AutobotV: WOOOO! GO WHEELJACK, YOU NAUGHTY BOY!

Wheeljack: I-I-I didn't mean it like THAT!

AutobotV: Soundwave seems to think so! But the question is did the readers get it? If not I'll start off with...

Wheeljack: NO, NO, NO, NO! Just leave this one out OK?

AutobotV: Fine.

Wheeljack tried to clam Soundwave down. Soundwave was still freaking out and a fountain of Energon was spewing from his nose, running down his face. Wow, Soundwave's a perv...WHAT AM I SAYING! Excuse me I'm going to run off and hurt myself. Wheeljack shook Soundwave's shoulders a bit.

'Soundwave I'm sorry, that came out wrong!' he cried.

'I-I-IT'S FINE...WHY DON'T WE JUST WALK?' stammered Soundwave, who finally stopped spewing Energon.

'Sure, but are you OK? You look like a little stiff, do you need a hand?'

Soundwave spewed even more Energon and began to totally spaz out so bad he made Red Alert look normal. Wheeljack tried to calm him down after he figure out, again, what he had just said.

'I didn't mean it like that Soundwave! I'm sorry!'

'I-I- CAN...D-DO IT MYSELF...B-BUT...YOU...THAT...WOULD...BE...OH PRIMUS!'

Soundwave fainted after losing so much Energon and Wheeljack tried to wake him up, unaware that the couple were being watched from the shadows by a single Decepticon...no wait two...oh no wait three, yeah three Decepticons, who were all called Reflector...so basically it's just the one guy but he's split into three. They watched...or should it be he watched? Anyway they/he watched the couple from a distance. Then they all faced each other.

'OK here's the plan! We wait till Soundwave is distracted and then we grab Wheeljack!' said one of the Reflector bots.

'Why do we want him again?'

'We're of the same mind you idiot! We...I mean...I have been over the plan an hundred times already!'

'I don't remember.'

'You're an idiot.

'It wasn't me it was him! And you just called yourself an idiot you twit!'

'Hah! You called yourself a twit!'

'Wait if I'm remembered and you didn't remember then how did...'

At that moment a bolt of lighting shot down from the sky making the mechs jump in fear. They had clearly pissed someone off but who, I wonder. After a moment or so they heard the angelic yet demonic voice of the writer booming all around them.

AutobotV: This is getting confusing, from now on you guys shall be known as Reflector 1, Reflector 2 and Reflector 3! Got it?

Reflector: Who's Reflector 1?

AutobotV: YOU FIGURE IT OUT!

Reflector 1 sighed as he decided to go through the plan again with his other two comrades. He somehow pulled out a board with lots of pictures, maps and words. Clearly they had been planning this!

'Look it's quite simple. We kidnap Wheeljack, force him to make another FIL or pile of crap and then we make Optimus Prime fall in love with us! Happy now?'

'How are we supposed to catch him with Soundwave standing around? He'll kill us!' cried Reflector 2.

'We'll just wait till he passes out or something. We can't do it now cause it's not in the script so we just got to wait as the story progresses. Are we all cool?'

The Reflector bots were silent until one said,

'So I'm Reflector 3 right?'

Anyway Wheeljack had finally awoken Soundwave and the two began walking towards the park. It was quite a while away so I magically sent them there instantly however they had no idea that I did that because I promised Wheeljack no funny stuff. Wheeljack and Soundwave were now in a nice, peaceful, cute little park.

'We sure got here quick didn't we?'

'YEAH, THAT WAS FAST.'

As they walked around they then noticed a funny looking ice-cream stand that was called Energon Ices! Serving the ice cream was none other than Grimlock, our loveable yet dummy of a Dinobot. Wheeljack was surprised that Grimlock could run his own business, he couldn't run his brain half the time.

'Grimlock? What are you doing?' demanded the mechanic.

'Me Grimlock make Energon Ice cream! Couples get free scoop but me Grimlock not know what couple is!' boomed the dumb Dinobot.

'Well...we're a couple...I guess.' muttered Wheeljack, blushing when Soundwave glanced at him.

'OK...Me Grimlock will give you free scoop.'

The Dinobot then gave the couple a scoop of ice cream, which seemed kind of pointless since they were wearing their face-gurads. As Wheeljack took his ice cream, Grimlock suddenly held out his hand.

'That's 4.98.' he demanded.

'WHAT? YOU JUST SAID THEY WERE FREE!' cried Soundwave.

'No, me Grimlock say couples get THREE scoops!'

'We only got two!' argued Wheeljack.

'That's because Grimlock got the third scoop!' snickered the Dinobot, as he tried to force the ice cream in his non-existing mouth.

Wheeljack just sighed and was thankful that Grimlock was too busy trying to figure out how he was going to eat the ice-cream. He looked at his ice cream, almost forgetting that he had his face-guard on. As he quickly slipped it off he glanced over at Soundwave and went bright red when he saw that Soundwave had also removed his face guard was was licking the ice cream. Wheeljack just stared and his own ice cream melted in his hand.

AutobotV: Aww Wheeljack...you being naughty again?

Wheeljack: N-no. I just never saw his mouth...I mean full face before.

AutobotV: Yeah I bet you wanna taste of that!

Wheeljack: S-shut up!

Soundwave noticed and stopped licking the treat, looking at Wheeljack with concern

Then he sent Wheeljack a cute little grin, even I'm turning into putty just thinking about it. Wheeljack went bright red when Soundwave spoke.

'Is something wrong?' he asked...wait a minute.

AutobotV: Soundwave what happened to your voice?

Soundwave: Oh that? It happens when I take the face guard off. Plus I was getting annoyed talking in capitals...why?

AutobotV: Oh I'm not complaining, you just sound so sexy right now. Well you sound sexy with it on but you know what I mean.

Wheeljack just continued staring, his face getter redder by the minute when Soundwave tried talking to him. Wheeljack was holding his ice-cream so tight it melted into his hand. Soundwave even noticed that Wheeljack was getting redder and hotter by the second.

'Are you OK? You have a fever or something?'

Then Soundwave did something that I taught him how to do by the way! He pressed his forehead up against Wheeljack's to check his tempeture. Now Wheeljack was getting hotter and even more redder. Soundwave was face to face to him and their lips were inches apart! Wheeljack was freaking out and sort of tried to get near but get far from Soundwave as possible. I just decided that this was going no where so I gave Wheeljack a little push! Wheeljack thought he was going to explode when he somehow ended up kissing Soundwave! Soundwave also went red and jumped back. Wheeljack forced a cheesy grin before running off.

'I just using going to the loo's!' he cried.

Soundwave cocked his head in confusion.

'Since when did we ever use toilets?' he pondered.

Wheeljack slammed the door and tried to stop his spark from jumping out of his body, he was that nervous. He pictured a rather hot and smutty moment between him and the Decepticon, but due to ratings I cannot release that information. I just giggled like a little school girl and sent him back out there, but he has no idea that I've done that. Wheeljack looked around in shock to find himself with Soundwave again and tried to think of something to rid his mind of dirty thoughts.

'So...er...where do you want to go next?' he asked.

'The movies?' suggested Soundwave.

Wheeljack flushed, I told him that's where couples go to make out and stuff! The mechanic nodded and the two mechs left Grimlock all alone, who was still tyring to figure out how to eat an ice-cream, even though he doesn't have a-

Grimlock: I know, me Grimlock will transform!

AutobotV: He does have brains!

Meanwhile Wheeljack was trying to figure out what to watch with Soundwave, looking at a long list of movies. Wheeljack wanted the Decepticon to pick the movie since he had no idea what to choose.

'Er...what do you want to watch?' asked the nervous Autobot.

'How about that film about an empire of machines that enslave mankind and feed off their energy while they dream and think that they are alive in a made up world and a puny human, who has strange powers, has to stop them!?'

'Sorry, Prime says I can't watch that film...it confused him.'

'Okay, how about the one where machines have taken over the world but they have to send one back in time to kill the mother of a human who could stop them?'

'Prowl told me it was a film meant for Decepticons.'

'How about we watch the one where aliens come down to Earth and ride around in giant robotic tri-pods and destroy man kind?'

'The old one or the crap one?'

'The crap one.'

'...What the heck...anything with Tom Cruise.'

As the mechs entered the building to buy popcorn and soda, they were unaware who else had entered the cinema to watch the crap film! Earlier on it was Optimus Prime, OP Jr and Prowl.

Optimus, is this wise? OP jr is still too young for a violent movie like this!' sighed Prowl

'Nonsense, he needs to learn how we Autobots fight Decepticons...I'm just gonna tell him that the big giant tri-pods are Decepticons so he'll grow up to hate them!'

'That's not it! That movie is crap and terrible!'

As they entered, they were shortly followed by the Reflector bots! After seeing both Wheeljack and Optimus prime enter the building they got rather excited...or should that be HE got excited?

'Hey, I saw Wheeljack and Optimus Prime come in here!'

'Sweet, this will be like hitting two Starscream's with one stone! We get Wheeljack to build the FIL and get Optimus Prime to make sweet, hardcore love to us!'

'Don't you mean Starscream and Sky Warp?

'Shut up Reflector 2!'

'I'm Reflector 3!'

As they ran in, and while I was recovering from a bad mental image, Megatron arrived and he was carrying a pregnant Starscream. The red Seeker was still whining and knitting as Megatron carried him into the cinema, thinking a movie might make Starscream's water burst.

'Hurry up Megatron! This is supposed to be a good film!'

'Yeah right, anything with Tom Cruise is bound to be dull.'

'But it has man killing machines in it! You like man killing machines!'

'We ARE man killing machines! Besides that's the only part I'm looking forward to!'

As all the mechs entered the building to watch the film, Wheeljack sat close to Soundwave, not noticing that the cinema had gotten dark or who else is in there...jeez what is going to happen next?


End file.
